Cringe-worthy lyrics

Mega-necro-thread bump

Dusted off the soundtrack to Wes Craven's "Shocker" for the first time in a while and rediscovered this classic from the track "Shockdance," a duet between Alice Cooper and actor Mitch ("X-Files") Pileggi, who played the film's villain, Horace Pinker:

"Stone cold, monster of a man
Half Jack the Ripper and a pinch of Son of Sam
Gashes, slashes, he’s malicious and vicious
He’s a killing machine and he never does the dishes!"

...ummm, what?

See, if it was someone like Rob Halford singing that I would say it's cringeworthy. But there's something about Alice Cooper; he can go from ultra-serious to cheesy ridiculous and it all seems to blend into his overall persona as a performer. I can't imagine anything he could sing that would register as cringeworthy.

I think I said this before...

Almost all of Annihilator’s lyrics by Jeff Waters are very cringey. He hasn’t progressed at all... he’s like a teenage amateur still after all these years. But his guitar skills make up for it!

Anvil is another band with cringeworthy lyrics. Although some might say that’s part of their charm.

The new Machine Head song is that way! Very amateur!!!

Pretty much every song from Venom these days would fit in this thread, but this one is just dreadful.

Open your eyes
Let battle begin
Fight for your life
The awakening

All you see is propaganda
All you hear is propaganda
Should I believe propaganda?
Over my dead body

In the cold light
Deep passions begin
Moon bathed in fire
Retribution

All you see is propaganda
All you hear is propaganda
Should I believe propaganda?
Over my dead body

Over my dead body
Over my dead body

Unholy propaganda
Heavenly propaganda
Blasphemy propaganda
Over my dead body

I like a plate at night with a glass of milk
Them butter creams go down smooth as silk
I like a plate at night when I'm in my bed
Never let them girl scouts, never let them go to your head
I like to eat my girl scout cookies

That coconut just drives my wild
I get my cookies fresh from a child
That peanut butter gets stuck to the roof of my mouth
I like my girls scouts east north west and south

I still cringe as much as I did when I first heard the beginning of the chorus to Metallica's Hardwired - not only that, it is the most boring single they have ever released, only rivaled by The Unnamed Feeling.