An Open Letter to all Forum Members

(Ahem) is this thing on?

Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking, I hope what I'm about to type will make sense. Here goes:

Recently this forum has seen a couple of threads (you know which ones, I'm sure) that have gotten... well, let's just say "heated."

I have (mostly) resisted the urge to do the usual "mod" thing and step into said discussions, because we're supposed to be adults here, and I figured it would eventually blow over.

However, I'm starting to get asked why I'm letting so-and-so talk shit or why I'm letting said threads get "out of control."

So here we go:

I am tired of getting in the middle of these dick swinging contests.

I may be a "mod" here, but apparently that carries very little authority.

If I try to be nice and say "hey guys, cool it," or attempt to defuse an argument with humor, I get ignored.

But if I bring the hammer down on somebody, then I'm a dick who's trampling on free speech, or whatever.
(The lone exception was when I banned the Flat Earth nut, because it seemed like everyone wanted to see him gone. Seriously... fuck that guy. Haha.)

It's not worth the aggravation.

Remember y'all, this is not "my" forum. I'm just the dumb ass who's been keeping the lights on and the soda machine stocked.

When Scott and KMorg moved on, I thought it would be temporary and that one of them would come back to take it over again at some point, but I guess that isn't happening any time soon.

As I said somewhere around here ... I just come here to talk about music and movies. I tune all the other noise out.

So can everybody just chill the fuck out, PLEASE?

Thank you.

Well said FF.  And I'm just the associate dumbass trying to keep the soda machine stocked.  

If any other member thinks they could do a better job than I'm more than happy to bow out.  

I sense the frustration in your post and I'm sure the rest of the mods share the feeling.  If you guys want the wild, wild, west well then have at it.  I for one will just bow out.

tohostudios wrote:

Well said FF.  And I'm just the associate dumbass trying to keep the soda machine stocked.  

That reminds me, we need to order more Jolt Cola.

How about Red Bull instead?

I sense a decline in the overall "oomph" around here.

tohostudios wrote:

How about Red Bull instead?

I sense a decline in the overall "oomph" around here.

I don't do those energy drinks. Bleah.
Hell with it, let's get some Olde English 800 instead.  

Free speech argument is invalid. Make some rules maybe about trolling behavior, no politics, no douche bags etc etc and then start locking threads that get out of hand. Give a warning privately, if they can't take it, nobody is forced to stay. I personally like this site, and hold no ill will towards anyone here, even though there has been a lot of ignorant shit said dealing with politics. Would hate to see people leave over this crap, but in the past couple months we've lost a few members, and every one of them was because of political arguments. So make some rules, people will either swallow their pride and chill the fuck out or they'll leave. They are already leaving, so might as well try option two and hope peeps will calm down and talk about music again.

Or, instead of making rules official, designate a thread for politics, anyone talks politics in other threads besides that one gets the thread locked, and given a warning. Do it again, you get put in time out for a day or two. I don't know, something should be done around here though, because it's tiring to sift through political garbage. I don't come to sites like this to talk about that shit, I come to discover music, talk music, and hopefully make a few friends along the way.

Anyways, when y'all are stocking the machine, don't forget the you-hoos yo!

I generally avoid threads about politics, religion, bands I find to be shitty, and any threads started by that Saxon guy. I don't troll, so topics I find uninteresting I just keep my distance.

For those who enjoy it, have at it.

Maybe add a “no man’s land” (enter at your own risk) thread.

I agree that we need to get back to basics. This is a music discussion site (first and foremost). Not to say other topics are off limits... but we should try to use proper discretion and restraint.

Politics is a negativity magnet. We all know it can bring out the worst in us.

My

Quote :

Politics is a negativity magnet. We all know it can bring out the worst in us.

common ground.. I completely agree with you.. so that being said I’m willing to take the first step here and say I apologize to all you guys including TZ and JamesB.. i’m absolutely willing to bury the hatchet, let the past be in the past and move forward.. I apologize TZ..I don’t think you’re a Nazi ... I think we could all agree that it doesn’t matter what I think,  you think or anybody else thinks ...the governments going to do what the governments going to do no matter who is in office... anyway... Im sorry and agree its time to get back to music...

Thank you Tulsa.

I sincerely apologize for the terrible things I said as well. I’m ashamed of my behavior. I feel like a Jekyll and Hyde character with the politics.

Fat Freddy wrote:

tohostudios wrote:

Well said FF.  And I'm just the associate dumbass trying to keep the soda machine stocked.  

That reminds me, we need to order more Jolt Cola.

Is Jolt Cola still around?

I used to participate in those political threads, stopped a long time ago because it is not about exchanging of ideas or debating but trying to convince that other person is wrong and that you are right.

I have a feeling my politics are way more liberal than most folks who post here, and I have almost left this board, not because of we believe differently but some of the comments have been downright shitty.

I know for a fact that toho and I disagree on a number of topics but we have never been disagreeable with one another.

I personally feel that the politics should be kept out of this forum, there are plenty of other forums, and places you can talk all about politics and that type of bullshit, does not to be done here, this place is our safe haven and escape from all that horseshit.

It people left cause of political discussion, they have to own their part in it. They chose to participate and it they have thin skin, so to speak, that is on them. More people have left over the years due to arguing about genre and other stupid crap, where is the virtue posturing over that?

As for banning/censoring whatever topic, that is up to the "card takers", but members do have the choice to click on the topic, read the post, and reply. If they have made those 3 choices, any and all accountability of their action(s) is on them....period.

It is a slippery slope cause offense can be had over anything, at anytime, by anyone, and our "card takers" have already stated the burden already at hand.

It is not that hard to figure out where a thread is going. You have the choice to engage or move on. Taking that choice away from others is BS in my opinion, for whatever that is worth.

Tulsa...

No need to apologize to me..

You stated how you felt in the moment, and we are free to reflect back, and make adjustments if need be. Simple concept.

Take that form of expression away, and one is easily susceptible to allowing others to dictate what, when, where, and how to feel. Crap in my book.

I support the uncensored open discussion of anything, but I want to try to keep it civil (personally speaking). Or else it’s just a pissing contest and we go on the verge of hating each other. That doesn’t benefit anyone.

Troublezone wrote:

I support the uncensored open discussion of anything, but I want to try to keep it civil (personally speaking). Or else it’s just a pissing contest and we go on the verge of hating each other. That doesn’t benefit anyone.

What benefit is gained from nobody taking personal accountability?
A person chooses to be civil or not.
A person chooses to be offended, or not
(IMHDO) approaching anything/everything with "kid gloves" is not a viable solution.

People are awesome...
People are @$$holes...
Pick a time and a place, they can be both.
That choice should remain mine to be either and that choice of how I'm perceived should remain on an individual basis.
Mileage may vary.

James B. wrote:

Troublezone wrote:

I support the uncensored open discussion of anything, but I want to try to keep it civil (personally speaking). Or else it’s just a pissing contest and we go on the verge of hating each other. That doesn’t benefit anyone.

What benefit is gained from nobody taking personal accountability?
A person chooses to be civil or not.
A person chooses to be offended, or not
(IMHDO) approaching anything/everything with "kid gloves" is not a viable solution.

People are awesome...
People are @$$holes...
Pick a time and a place, they can be both.
That choice should remain mine to be either and that choice of how I'm perceived should remain on an individual basis.
Mileage may vary.

Like I said, I’m open to uncensored discussion of anything. I’m just gonna be less abrasive in delivery. That’s just me... I can also choose (as you mentioned) to not participate. I’m not restricting myself, just making some adjustments.

For the record... I don’t take responsibility for any other past member’s decision to leave. For the same reasons as you stated above. No one is totally innocent.

Troublezone wrote:

Like I said, I’m open to uncensored discussion of anything. I’m just gonna be less abrasive in delivery. That’s just me... I can also choose (as you mentioned) to not participate. Im not restricting myself, just making some adjustments.

I get that

Somebody removed the ladder and I couldn't get off the rooftop

I just pass over things. Nothing phases me that much....except CD recommendations.
But you do have to remember....some of us are boozers....and hop on the site

I've decided to just stay out of the political discussions. I have Facebook and the news if I need that. This is my place to nerd out instead of getting stressed out.

I don't mind the political threads too much. I enjoy reading the stuff but barely comment. I'm just not that passionate about it.

007 wrote:

I don't mind the political threads too much. I enjoy reading the stuff but barely comment. I'm just not that passionate about it.

I enjoy them as well but comment (perhaps too much) but at the end of the day, its all opinions - metal, politics, FF's taste in horror movies, etc

I get this format affords a certain degree of anonymity but still think it is possible to have a conversation without devolving into hurling insults and belittling each other. We should save all that for our politicians

Yeah, those threads are a bore. I'm just glad 15-years-ago me is gone, else I'd have lit that shit up.

now we can all get back to arguing whether Priest or Maiden are the best!