Malevolent Creation guitarist prevents store robbery

MetalGuy71 wrote:

Fat Freddy wrote:

MetalGuy71 wrote:

Free publicity? I never heard of Malevolent Creation before all this bruhaha.

Or maybe just to earn him some "street cred". Kinda like when 50 Cent was shot 7 times and lived to tell/rap about it. Now MC can write a song about this whole thing. Years from now, some fruity guy will cover it on American Idol 2018 and Walmart will have exclusive rights for their latest release, which will plug right into your brain stem from a port that everyone under 30 will have installed at birth, right after the circumcision. This port will enable us to download music and other information directly into our brains, eliminating the need for schools and teachers. And since kids will already be enormous globs of fat from all the non-activity from years of video game play, they will need someone to tend to their basic needs, hence, trained monkeys. Eventually the trained monkeys will learn that they are more powerful than their human masters and start a revolution. I don't think I need to tell you what happens next.

MG, sometimes you really scare me, y'know that?

Well, just to be on the safe side, I'm heading off to the zoo with a bushel of bananas and a glock.

It reminds me of 2 movies WALL-E and Planet of Apes. But on my area there is plenty of fat people, even I have gained some pounds, people don't exercise like before

But seriously folks: the message board under that Blabbermouth article about it being "bogus" is lit up like a Christmas tree right now. It's frickin hilarious. When the story first appeared about the alleged shoot-out, everyone was like "F*ck yeah Phil! You the MAN!", now it's all "F*ck YOU Phil!"

ultmetal wrote:

Free chocolate milk? Right on! Makes the whole ordeal worth it.

That's the saddest part of all this... Phil won't be getting any free chocolate milk.

His bogus story was a Malevolent Creation.

Still waiting for Blabbermouth to follow up this story. Maybe there'll be a statement from Phil F. that sez something like "Well, y'know, what happened was, I was tripping on some really good acid and playin' Grand Theft Auto, so what happened in the game felt SO REAL, maaaaan!"

He doesn't want to admit that he was hiding in the corner, whimpering like a whipped puppy, while sitting in a puddle of his own urine.

This story just keeps getting better... Phil sent another rambling message to Blabbermouth today

Fasciana sent the following e-mail to BLABBERMOUTH.NET earlier today (Thursday, July 9):

"Concerning this idiotic debate over my involvement in an attempted robbery and shootout, I wish everyone would believe it is not true and leave me the f*ck alone.

"For all the retards who hide behind a computer all day at mommy's house and talk sh*t about rumors on Blabbermouth and other heavy metal-related websites, you need to get a life!!!! Get out of the house and maybe someone will try robbing and shooting you one day!!!! Then I would like to hear your reaction!!!

"I never posted or told anyone but my brother about what happened to me afterwards. Why would I post something that horrible on Blabbermouth or anywhere on the Internet and have people know what I had just gone through? I found out by friends a day later that they read that news about on Blabbermouth. Why and who posted, I have no idea and it has nothing to do with music or my band, so why it would be on a website that is and used to be about finding out information about heavy metal bands and the news concerning the bands that have news to release about there bands future happenings and releases. Now it is just a big gossip column for people who have no life and talk sh*t about people."

(For the record, Fasciana's latest e-mail was sent to BLABBERMOUTH.NET from the same e-mail address as the original message which contained the details of the alleged shooting incident. Phil subsequently confirmed to BLABBERMOUTH.NET that he is, in fact, in control of this e-mail account.)

"This is the second incident I have been involved with that resulted in someone dying in South Florida and I'm glad they both were not glorified in the news and press.

"A few years ago me and a friend were driving on a very busy street in Ft. Lauderdale when a drunk homeless man ran into the street and we ran him down and killed him and there was no way to avoid it. It was in the afternoon with many witnesses, and when the police arrived, we told them what happened and let us leave and that was the end of story!!! Me and my friend were mortified and there was no news about it or information given to us afterwards at anytime.

"South Florida has bigger problems then homeless people robbing liquor stores and small corner stores with hopes of getting caught to go to jail purposely so they have a home for a few days!!!

"My mother was robbed at gunpoint after leaving work and trying to make a money deposit after her work day and got robbed for over $25,000 of the store she manages money and never got any justice and there was no news or anything done for her.

"Two of my good friends were gunned down in a Denny's restaurant parking lot and killed for no reason and nothing was done or had any news about what happened to them and that is heavy sh*t!!!!

"Believe what you idiots want!!! This whole incident is as dead to me as the fool who tried killing me!!!!! This is why I haven't gone to Blabbermouth for music news a few years ago. There is hardly any music-related news. If someone in a band has a hangnail or stubbed their toe, it is reported on Blabbermouth and people sh*t-talk about it.

"Some of you people need to get a real life. When something horrible or tragic happens to someone or someone's family that can create problems and drama, most people would like to keep that news out of press just like me. Because of retards that have nothing better to do than spread rumors and news, it's too late for me to have my family not know about what happened to me and has caused even more problems for me and my family.

"And for the record, the robbery and shootout didn't happen in Ft. Lauderdale!! So there is some more wrong info for you idiots to debate about.

"I have been in jail and arrested for many stupid things while living in South Florida and I never got to make the news down here and I'm glad!!!! As I'm sure many other people who have been involved with tragic or embarrassing incidents that got them involved or in trouble would like it as well.

"Believe what you want!!! I'm going to band practice!!!! I have a life!!!"

Um....oooooookay, thanks Phil, that really clears things up.

Needless to say, the Blabbermouth message board brigade are having a field day with this latest installment, to the point where they're now coming up with "Chuck Norris Facts" style jokes about Phil Fasciana. The best one I read said "Phil Fasciana is so death metal that when he drank two bottles of chocolate milk while watching 'The Wiz,' it killed Michael Jackson."

For some odd reason my mind went wandering back to this story the other day and I wonder, did anyone ever find out one way or the other if this story was B.S. or not?

Fat Freddy wrote:

For some odd reason my mind went wandering back to this story the other day and I wonder, did anyone ever find out one way or the other if this story was B.S. or not?

When I saw this thread got bumped, I opened it hoping to see this very question answered.

Thanks for the disappointment FF...

tohostudios wrote:

When I saw this thread got bumped, I opened it hoping to see this very question answered.

Thanks for the disappointment FF...

Sorry.

Looks like the whole story got put away in the "Who Gives a Sh*t?" file.