Blender's 40 Worst Lyricists In Rock

Fat Freddy wrote:

I love KISS as much as the next guy but Paul Stanley's inclusion on this list is probably justified. Let's face it, their lyrics ain't exactly Shakespeare.

Yes, but how can you include Paul and not include Gene or Ace. I mean Gene wrote such deep songs as "Plaster Caster".

Blender are idiots. Anyone seen their "50 worst artists" list?

Nope...Can we see?

No Chad Kroeger? Nickelback sux!

How is Kevin Federline not #1?

I am a bit confused as to the Queensryche inclusion. I have never thought of them to be lacking lyrically at all. In fact, their lyrics and the way Tate sings them is, imho, the strongest point of the band. How about including the Cherry Pie guy, Janie Lane. That song must have took all of a minute and a half to write.

the sentinel wrote:

How is Kevin Federline not #1?

I am a bit confused as to the Queensryche inclusion. I have never thought of them to be lacking lyrically at all. In fact, their lyrics and the way Tate sings them is, imho, the strongest point of the band. How about including the Cherry Pie guy, Janie Lane. That song must have took all of a minute and a half to write.

In an intervew he said that the guy that was in responsable of the album called him the night before they started recording the album that there was a song missing and he wrote Cherry Pie. The album became Cherry Pie and during this interview he don't stop sayin that he could shot himself for writing this song.

80's Alice Cooper is downright embarassing...

"Feed My Frankenstein"

Well, I ain't evil
I'm just good lookin'
Start a little fire
and baby start cookin'
I'm a hungry man
But I don't want pizza
I'll blow down your house
And then I'm gonna eat ya
Bring you to a simmer
Right on time
Run my greasy fingers
Up your greasy spine

Feed my Frankenstein
Meet my libido
"He's a psycho"
Feed my Frankenstein
Hungry for love, and it's feeding time

You don't want to talk
So baby shut up
And let me drink the wine from your fur tea cup
Velcro candy, sticky sweet
Make my tattoos melt in the heat
Well, I ain't no veggie
Like my flesh on the bone
Alive and lickin' on your ice cream cone

Feed my Frankenstein
Meet my libido
"He's a psycho"
Feed my Frankenstein
Hungry for love, and it's feeding time
Baby whoa-whoa oh yeah
Feed my Frankenstei-ei-ein
Baby Chow Down
Feed my Frankenstei-ei-ein

You mean velcro candy doesn't tickle your artistic sensibilities??

That song came out in 1990, buddy

Oh, and its one of my favorites.

Come on Paul McCartney shouldn't have made the list...

''I say Hello! You say Goodbye!''

No seriously he really shouldn't have made the list.

DeathCult wrote:

That song came out in 1990, buddy

Oh, and its one of my favorites.

ok, then 90's era Cooper can be included as well. i just remember laughing more at that scene in Wayne's World, than any other part of that movie.

Oh, the lyrics are definately ridiculous, that just happens to be one of the songs from his glammier stuff. The video for "House Of Fire" I always laugh at though.

mc666 wrote:

80's Alice Cooper is downright embarassing...

"Feed My Frankenstein"

Well, I ain't evil
I'm just good lookin'
Start a little fire
and baby start cookin'
I'm a hungry man
But I don't want pizza
I'll blow down your house
And then I'm gonna eat ya
Bring you to a simmer
Right on time
Run my greasy fingers
Up your greasy spine

Feed my Frankenstein
Meet my libido
"He's a psycho"
Feed my Frankenstein
Hungry for love, and it's feeding time

You don't want to talk
So baby shut up
And let me drink the wine from your fur tea cup
Velcro candy, sticky sweet
Make my tattoos melt in the heat
Well, I ain't no veggie
Like my flesh on the bone
Alive and lickin' on your ice cream cone

Feed my Frankenstein
Meet my libido
"He's a psycho"
Feed my Frankenstein
Hungry for love, and it's feeding time
Baby whoa-whoa oh yeah
Feed my Frankenstei-ei-ein
Baby Chow Down
Feed my Frankenstei-ei-ein

That was actually written by Zodiac Mindwarp, his schtick with his band the Love Reaction was about writing incredibly over the top witty and funny sexual innuendo with a self-aware smirk and tongue firmly planted in cheek.

Here's a bit more Zodiac from his song Backseat Education, it's a riot:

You Wanna Know About Love.
Lemme Teach Yeah
Come To Church I'm The Preacher
Jump In The Motor
Let The Kisses Cascade
I'm The Love Commando This Is A Raid
If Love Is An Art, Baby I'm Surreal
With You By My Side
Can't Keep My Hands On The Wheel
Unbuckle That Strap Jump In The Back
Let's Steam Up The Windows Of My Cadillac.

Gimme Back Seat Education
Working Up A Sweat On The Leatherette
I Said Back Seat Education
Little Girl You're The Teacher's Pet

I'm The Genius Of Love
I Got An Honours Degree
Baby You're In Luck
I'm Gonna Teach You For Free
I'll Show You Things
You Don't Learn At School
I'll Show You Baby How To Break The Rules
Blow Torch Baby Give Me Hot Job Precision
Apocalypse Lips Nuclear Kissing
Oh Baby It Ain't Solitaire
Horizontal Hold Get Your Legs In The Air

No Annihilator?? Jeff Waters writes some of the dumbest lyrics, even though i like his music.


Excess perversion, and we'll never let it end
You and I are making a private legend
We've got the hunger, got the thirst
You want it slow, our bodies glow, nails rake my back

Tongue licks sweet parade
Animal lust and it burns like a buzzsaw blade
Dripping wet, we laugh at this charade
Screams of love in the air tonight and it burns like a buzzsaw blade

Gratification, do you want some more
On the bed, entangled on the floor
Feel my eyes burn, we writhe until the dawn
Tease and please, humility is gone

Tongue licks sweet parade
Animal lust and it burns like a buzzsaw blade
Dripping wet, we laugh at this charade
Screams of love in the air tonight and it burns like a buzzsaw blade

Come on
What are you waiting for...

Excess perversion, and we'll never let it end
You and I are making a private legend
Feel my eyes burn, feel everything
On my knees, but I reign as your king

Tongue licks sweet parade
Animal lust and it burns like a buzzsaw blade
Dripping wet, we laugh at this charade
Screams of love in the air tonight and it burns like a buzzsaw blade

ultmetal wrote:

Fat Freddy wrote:

I love KISS as much as the next guy but Paul Stanley's inclusion on this list is probably justified. Let's face it, their lyrics ain't exactly Shakespeare.

Yes, but how can you include Paul and not include Gene or Ace. I mean Gene wrote such deep songs as "Plaster Caster".

And "Great Expectations".

AceFrehley655 wrote:

the sentinel wrote:

How is Kevin Federline not #1?

I am a bit confused as to the Queensryche inclusion. I have never thought of them to be lacking lyrically at all. In fact, their lyrics and the way Tate sings them is, imho, the strongest point of the band. How about including the Cherry Pie guy, Janie Lane. That song must have took all of a minute and a half to write.

In an intervew he said that the guy that was in responsable of the album called him the night before they started recording the album that there was a song missing and he wrote Cherry Pie. The album became Cherry Pie and during this interview he don't stop sayin that he could shot himself for writing this song.

I know. I saw "Heavy: The Story of Metal " on VH1 last summer too. But I still blame him for not standing up to the record execs. I mean, c'mon, they put a picture of a guy who is supposed to be a rec exec on the cover of the first album and call it Dirty, Rotten, Filthy, Stinkin' Rich and then have the chance to stick it to them and JL can't get his balls out of his pocket. That's why I blame him. Like Testament said, Practice What You Preach. Also, I don't think he had any problem with the song when he was cashing checks and dating the blonde in the video and driving around in a Ferrari that that album paid for. Just my opinion. Peace.

Eyesore wrote:

I didn't realize Queensryche was a person. Guess "That guy from Queensryche" would have shown their disingenuous "journalism" a bit more clearly.

I was thinking the same thing.

Neil Peart? What the hell are they smoking?

How in the hell is Scott Stapp somehow better than Neal Peart??

Blender sucks, their writing sucks, and the so called " " artistist' they cover do not even write their own lyrics, even if some of these artist aren't excatly Dylan Thomas, these artists at least created something of lasting value, Blender doesn't even make good toliet paper.

DeathCult wrote:

Oh, the lyrics are definately ridiculous, that just happens to be one of the songs from his glammier stuff. The video for "House Of Fire" I always laugh at though.

I think the lyrics to "Trash" were meant to be ridiculous, and Alice certainly succeded