Worst Lyrics ever...?

candlemass wrote:

Fat Freddy wrote:

Even though I love Barren Cross to death, I still cringe every time I hear the lyric:

"Better than pot, JEEEEEEEEESUS RAWWWWWKS!"

in the song "Believe"

"Smoke on His love"!

Ugh.

I'm waiting for someone to post the lyrics to "Kings of Metal" by Manowar.

Required Fields wrote:

I'm waiting for someone to post the lyrics to "Kings of Metal" by Manowar.

I'll "one-up" that request....

Wrote a letter to the m.t.v.
Whats goin on now
Dont ya care about me
Sent the same letter to the radio,
But my party went dead
Like a shot in the head
We all like it-rock and roll
We all want it-on your show
Play it loud,dont play it low
Blow your speakers with rock and roll

We got lots of stations
Around the nation
And the stuff theyre playing
It just aint worth my sayin
People want music to getem movin
We dont want labels
We want music on the table

We all like it-rock and roll
We all want it-on your show
Play it loud,dont play it low
Blow your speakers with rock and roll

We all like it-rock and roll
We all want it-on your show
Play it loud,dont play it low
Blow your speakers with rock and roll

We got lots of stations
Around the nation
And the stuff theyre playing
It just aint worth my sayin

We all like it-rock and roll
We all want it-on your show
Play it loud,dont play it low
Blow your speakers with rock and roll

Cool song,silly lyrics

DallasBlack wrote:

Faith No More-Be Aggressive


Tall and reckless
Ugly seed
Reach down my throat
You filthy bird
That's all I need
This empty pit
I've got to feed
To prove I'm fit
A healthy man
I've got to be
Malnutrition, my submission
You're the master
And I take it on my knees
Ejaculation
Tribulation
I SWALLOW, I SWALLOW, I SWALLOW, I SWALLOW

thats actually a really good song

in regard to cannibal corpse i love the tomb of the mutilated album a lot but i can never tell what the lyrics are so it does not bother me

TheGooch wrote:

DallasBlack wrote:

Faith No More-Be Aggressive


Tall and reckless
Ugly seed
Reach down my throat
You filthy bird
That's all I need
This empty pit
I've got to feed
To prove I'm fit
A healthy man
I've got to be
Malnutrition, my submission
You're the master
And I take it on my knees
Ejaculation
Tribulation
I SWALLOW, I SWALLOW, I SWALLOW, I SWALLOW

thats actually a really good song

Oh, great song no doubt about it (especially the guitar solo) but the lyrics are gross and not to mention queer as hell.

I believe that Faith No More song was written by keyboardist Roddy Bottum, who actually is openly gay.

he done it because he fort it would be funny to make mike patton have to sing it because mike patton made a fair amount of gay jokes lol

Required Fields wrote:

I believe that Faith No More song was written by keyboardist Roddy Bottum, who actually is openly gay.

Am I the only one who finds it ironic as hell that the gay guy's last name is "Bottum?"

I'm sorry, that was tasteless

Required Fields wrote:

I believe that Faith No More song was written by keyboardist Roddy Bottum, who actually is openly gay.

That doesn't change the fact that the lyrics are diiiiiisgusting!!!!!! I've often said that what a person does in the privacy of their own home is sick and I don't want to know about it . Ironic though, he didn't come out of the closet until a year after that album was released. However, the lyrics can never be as sick and disgusting as Mike Patton himself, "the boy just aint right".

"Metal Militia" by Metallica. Kick-ass song, awful lyrics.

Actual warning note on Paul Chain's "Alkahest" album, which also features Lee Dorian of Cathedral (pretty good doom album actually).

"Warning: Paul Chain sings in a language that has not been invented yet"

I never realized how dumb some of Helloween's early lyrics were till I got the deluxe version of WALLS OF JERICHO (with the mini-LP and "Judas" included), which was the first time I'd had a lyric sheet for most of the songs.

This bit from "Reptile" cracks me up in particular:

"You won't believe till you know that it's real
the pain in your stomach and the horror that you feel
You need a sh*t, so you head off to the loo
You're coming to the bog, now what you're gonna do?"

Fat Freddy wrote:

I never realized how dumb some of Helloween's early lyrics were till I got the deluxe version of WALLS OF JERICHO (with the mini-LP and "Judas" included), which was the first time I'd had a lyric sheet for most of the songs.

This bit from "Reptile" cracks me up in particular:

"You won't believe till you know that it's real
the pain in your stomach and the horror that you feel
You need a sh*t, so you head off to the loo
You're coming to the bog, now what you're gonna do?"

ah man thats good stuff

i like the lyrics to kraf dinner by annihilaotor

cupboards bare
im so hungry
life aint fair
gimme some money

macaroni maniac
a cheddar cheese heart attack

boiling water
i cant wait
its getting hotter
it feels so great!

TheGooch wrote:

ah man thats good stuff

i like the lyrics to kraf dinner by annihilaotor

cupboards bare
im so hungry
life aint fair
gimme some money

macaroni maniac
a cheddar cheese heart attack

boiling water
i cant wait
its getting hotter
it feels so great!

"Kraf Dinner is full of love and butter!!"

i used to have that song as my ringtone on my mobile phone

Well I think Kraf Dinner was SUPPOSED to be a silly song. As for some retarded lyrics check out anything by HeavyHeavyLowLow...yes that's the band's name. The band is like the "Epic Movie" of awful bands (yes I'm referring to the piece of trash of a movie).

Chairman_Smith wrote:

scottmitchell74 wrote:

Anal C*nt has the worst I've seen both from a nonsense standpoint and their attempt at shock.....

Worst bandname as well.

And the worst music...

Pretty much anything Nickelback has done.

Anvil - "Five Knuckle Shuffle"


Hand to the gland and I don't care
There ain't no secret I won't bare
Hey!
All I wanna do is beat my meat
Shakin' steak, what a treat
Stroke it, stroke it really hard
I wanna watch it blow a yard
Palm sister date what you got
Wank your willie, hit the spot

5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
5 knuckle shuffle I got nothin' to poke

Rattle my snake most every night
I wanna woman to do it right
Stroke it, stroke it just for fun
Stroke it, stroke it till I cum
All I wanna do is shake my stick
Pullin' my pecker really does the trick

5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
All I wanna do is give it a stroke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
5 knuckle shuffle I got nothin' to poke
Nothin' to poke
That's right!

Don't you worry when you spank the chimp
It don't mean that you're a wimp
Stroke it, stroke it all night long
Stroke it, stroke it ding my dong
Palm sister date what you got
Shine your shilaylly, don't get caught

5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
All I wanna do is give it a stroke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
5 knuckle shuffle I got nothin' to poke

As much as I love High On Fire...these lyrics kill me:

Cometh Down Hessian

Enter stoned paravex
mother of the seekers
Cometh down hessian
to plunder the archaic tomb

Stolen ancient amulet
black the hexed sarcophagus
Summoning the hound
the bringer of impending doom

Necromantic lunatics
murder of the innocents
Stepping on the curse
inflicting it's beastious wounds (beastious?)

Undo the evil spell
undig the graves demise (wtf?)
Unveiling the horror
the hair covered corpse now will lie



Great tune though.

SpectreFate wrote:

Anvil - "Five Knuckle Shuffle"


Hand to the gland and I don't care
There ain't no secret I won't bare
Hey!
All I wanna do is beat my meat
Shakin' steak, what a treat
Stroke it, stroke it really hard
I wanna watch it blow a yard
Palm sister date what you got
Wank your willie, hit the spot

5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
5 knuckle shuffle I got nothin' to poke

Rattle my snake most every night
I wanna woman to do it right
Stroke it, stroke it just for fun
Stroke it, stroke it till I cum
All I wanna do is shake my stick
Pullin' my pecker really does the trick

5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
All I wanna do is give it a stroke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
5 knuckle shuffle I got nothin' to poke
Nothin' to poke
That's right!

Don't you worry when you spank the chimp
It don't mean that you're a wimp
Stroke it, stroke it all night long
Stroke it, stroke it ding my dong
Palm sister date what you got
Shine your shilaylly, don't get caught

5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
All I wanna do is give it a stroke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
5 knuckle shuffle I got nothin' to poke

I've seen them do that song live! It brought the frickin' house down!!

Fat Freddy wrote:

SpectreFate wrote:

Anvil - "Five Knuckle Shuffle"


Hand to the gland and I don't care
There ain't no secret I won't bare
Hey!
All I wanna do is beat my meat
Shakin' steak, what a treat
Stroke it, stroke it really hard
I wanna watch it blow a yard
Palm sister date what you got
Wank your willie, hit the spot

5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
5 knuckle shuffle I got nothin' to poke

Rattle my snake most every night
I wanna woman to do it right
Stroke it, stroke it just for fun
Stroke it, stroke it till I cum
All I wanna do is shake my stick
Pullin' my pecker really does the trick

5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
All I wanna do is give it a stroke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
5 knuckle shuffle I got nothin' to poke
Nothin' to poke
That's right!

Don't you worry when you spank the chimp
It don't mean that you're a wimp
Stroke it, stroke it all night long
Stroke it, stroke it ding my dong
Palm sister date what you got
Shine your shilaylly, don't get caught

5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
All I wanna do is give it a stroke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
Chokin' the chicken ain't no joke
5 knuckle shuffle in the shower with the soap
5 knuckle shuffle I got nothin' to poke

I've seen them do that song live! It brought the frickin' house down!!

I thought this was a spinal tap song at first!

Almost as bad as some of Halford's lyrics...


Mechanix

[D. Mustaine]

Imagine you were at my station
And you brought your motor to me
Your a burner yeah a real motor car
Said you wanna get your order filled
Made me shiver when I put it in
Pumping just won't do ya know luckily for you
Who ever though you'd be better
At turning a screw than me
I do it for my life
Made my drive shaft crank
Made my pistons bulge
Made my ball bearings melt from the heat
We were shifting hard when we took off
Put tonight all four on the floor
When we hit top end ya know it feels too slow
I'm giving you my room service
And ya know it's more than enough
Oh one more time ya know I'm in love

Another from our good friends in Anvil.

"Hair Pie"

Dessert is my favourite meal, I eat it every day
A dietary supplement that's certain to stay
It's my favourite recipe and it's easy to follow
Can't wait to get a mouthful, bite down and swallow

It's got the flavour that can't be beat
It's a mans treat
Knee high in hair pie
Knee high in hair pie

A little bit of this and a little bit of that
Connoisseurs dessert is eaten on your back
Add a little honey, maybe some whipped cream
Do it with a friend if you know what I mean

Knee high in hair pie
Knee high in hair pie

Put the batter in the bowl, then begin to stir
Bring it to a lather if you want to be sure
The flavour of this delicacy really can't be beat
It's a man's meal that's more than just a treat

It's got the taste that can't be beat
More than a mans treat
Knee high in hair pie