TODAY I WATCHED... (Movies, TV) 2021

AC/DC "The Bon Scott Years"

Frankenstein's Army

This movie had a lot of potential, the creature designs are highly original and reminiscent of the Japanese "steampunk" sub-genre. Unfortunately (probably due to budget constraints) the film uses the dreaded "found footage/shaky cam" approach through its entirety and half the time you can't even tell what's going on. And when you can tell, it's very distracting because with everything that's happening nobody would just keep filming.

Ohio Valley Wrestling

"Return of the Jedi" (1983)

The original "Star Wars" trilogy comes to a close. The gang rescues Han Solo from Jabba the Hutt, Luke has his final showdown with Darth Vader and the Emperor, and the Rebellion battles the Empire's souped-up new and improved Death Star. Also, Ewoks.
My 13 year old (who has been experiencing the trilogy for the first time) says this one was his favorite so far, though the "Luke & Leia are brother & sister" revelation took him a few minutes to process, haha.

Twilight Zone - Long Distance Call

One of two episodes featuring a very young Bill Mumy (Will Robinson in Lost In Space and Lennier in Babylon 5). This one features the kid talking to his newly dead grandmother on a toy telephone and she keeps trying to convince him to "join her". This is one episode that could have been in the generally padded 1 hour TZs later in the series because there's a lot going on here that could have been further explored.

tohostudios wrote:

Frankenstein's Army

This movie had a lot of potential, the creature designs are highly original and reminiscent of the Japanese "steampunk" sub-genre.  Unfortunately (probably due to budget constraints) the film uses the dreaded "found footage/shaky cam" approach through its entirety and half the time you can't even tell what's going on.  And when you can tell, it's very distracting because with everything that's happening nobody would just keep filming.  

Yah, it was enjoyable for what it was, but the potential was there for some REALLY messed up fun... The creature designs were really interesting. The cast wasn't too bad, in my opinion.

And yah, who the FUCK would keep filming after seeing mutilated bodies and messed up experiments....

The Conjuring:The Devil Made Me Do It (2021)



Another installment of the film series based on the real cases of paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren. In this one, the couple take on a sensationalistic case in proving a young man committed murder while possessed by a demon. This is a really good film with some interesting scenes. Creepiest part is the actual exorcism recording played over the closing credits of the film.

Dozed off last night to a cheap, crappy "documentary" on the James Bond franchise called "007: For Our Eyes Only," in which a dull-voiced female narrator recited "facts" about the series that even the most casual Bond fan would already know, over a bunch of still photos and film clips everyone has seen a zillion times.
I'm assuming this was an unauthorized doc cuz there's no way that EON Productions would've stamped their approval on this piece of junk.
Nothing new here, avoid!

The Amusement Park (1973/2020)



In 1973, the Lutheran Society commissioned a PSA film to showcase the abuse and ageism that faces our elderly citizens, and hired George Romero to direct it. Not surprisingly, the Society was not happy with the somewhat disturbing results and had it shelved. The film was thought lost until discovered in 2017. Originally filmed with a 16 mm camera, it was given a digital enhancement a released in 2020. It's A surreal film, involving an elderly gentleman loose in an amusement park where things slowly devolve into a nightmare for him. This short (under an hour) film really reminded me of a Twilight Zone episode, including an opening and closing narrative, a la Rod Sterling.

"Remember as you watch the film: one day you will be old."

"Enter the Dragon" (1973)

A kung fu expert turned secret agent (Bruce Lee) infiltrates a secret martial arts tournament at a super villain's private island fortress, so he can take apart the host's smuggling operations from the inside. Of course, he kicks many butts along the way, with a little help from fellow bad-asses John Saxon (who apparently was a black belt in real life) and the awesomely Afro'd Jim Kelly.
Somehow I'd never seen this classic until last night, but I'm glad I finally did. "Enter the Dragon" is an action packed combo of martial arts and spy thriller, and it's a ton of fun! Sadly, this was the last film Lee completed before his untimely death, which is a shame because this character could have turned into a franchise for him. Weep for what might have been.

"The Show Must Go On: The Queen and Adam Lambert Story" (2019)

This flashy rock doc tells the story of how the members of Queen and "American Idol" runner up Adam Lambert came together to honor Freddie Mercury and continue the band's legendary run. I'm not even a particularly huge Queen fan, but after watching Lambert belt out a selection of their classics on concert stages around the world in this doc, I have to say that they definitely found the right guy.

I'll have to watch that Queen doc because I AM a huge Queen fan.

Today I watched a Twilight Zone episode I completely forgot about: "The Silence"

Basically the plot is that an elder statesman of a country club bets a loudmouth younger member that he can't remain silent for a whole year. If the guy does stay silent he wins $500K. The guy is in debt to his eyeballs because his wife loves shopping at Tiffany's. The young guy wins the bet but then comes the inevitable TZ twist (which unfortunately I remembered right before it was revealed).

Mother's Day(2010)-a young couple who has just bought a home has a party to celebrate with some of their friends. However, the former residents (three bank robbing brothers and their psycho mother) crash the party, looking for their money that they think is still in the house. They will stop at nothing to find it, including tormenting and killing the guests. A loose remake of the original Mother's Day from the early 80s, this version is pretty intense and violent, reminding me in tone of the remake of I Spit on Your Grave at times. However, the movie's ending was a little unsatisfying for me, so it tarnishes my overall view of the film a bit. 2/5

Loki episode 1

"Bandidas" (2006)

In turn of the century Mexico, two women (Penelope Cruz and Salma Hayek) team up to become bank robbers and eventually folk heroines as they battle to save their town from a crooked railroad baron.
This light, breezy action/comedy has a pretty standard Western plot but it's fun to watch, thanks mainly to the charms of its two leading ladies (*cough cough CLEAVAGE cough cough*). Outlaw country star Dwight Yoakam is a suitably despicable villain, and Steve Zahn is a hoot as a dorky Pinkerton detective who gets caught up in the girls' cause. A decemt time waster.

Walker

Paranormal Caught On Camera

"Skyscraper" (1996)

Yet another low budget "Die Hard" wanna-be, this time starring Anna Nicole Smith (of all people!) as a chopper pilot who lands on top of a high rise that's been taken over by terrorists, and ends up having to stop their plot to steal some top secret satellite tech (or something). Endless shootouts, explosions, and hilarity ensue.  
Poor Anna Nicole (God rest her) never could act worth a damn, but that's OK because everyone else in the cast over-acts wildly to make up for it. Anna's robotic performance eventually turns this into an unintentional comedy, and of course she gets her comically large boobs out several times, which I assume was the movie's major selling point.
"Skyscraper" is so bad, it's almost good.

I guess this is my week for "Die Hard" wanna-bees featuring former Playmates...first I watched "Skyscraper" with Anna Nicole Smith, and now...

"No Contest" (1994)

A criminal gang (led by Andrew Dice Clay) takes over a high rise luxury hotel in the middle of the "Miss Galaxy" beauty pageant. They demand a payment of $10 million in diamonds for their beauty queen hostages, but the pageant's hostess (Shannon Tweed, aka Mrs. Gene Simmons) is not just a former Miss Galaxy contestant, she's also an action-movie star, kickboxer and all around butt kicker. You can probably figure out the rest.
This flick wasn't quite as ridiculous as "Skyscraper," due mainly to the casting -- most of the participants can at least act to some degree. Shannon keeps her clothes on for a change, which may be a disappointment for those who remember her as the Queen of Late Night Skin-E-Max, but her awkward martial-arts moves provide some unintentional humor. Dice-Man seems to be having a good time playing the sleazy bad guy, and the always-welcome Robert Davi and Rowdy Roddy Piper (!) turn up in supporting roles!
Silly, but fun low-budget action junk, followed by a sequel!

Twilight Zone, Season 2 - "Will The Real Martian Please Stand Up"

Classic TZ episode and every time I see it I think of the song "Twilight Zone" from 2112. "...beneath his hat the strangeness lies; take it off he's got three eyes..."

"Eye See You" (aka "D-Tox," 2002)

After he loses his fiancee' to a serial killer, an FBI agent (Sylvester Stallone) becomes dependent on alcohol and signs up for a rehab program that specializes in helping law enforcement agents. Soon after he arrives at the remote facility, a massive snowstorm blows in and his fellow patients suddenly begin dying, which means the killer has followed him there to pick up where they left off.
This thriller sports a cool, wintry, claustrophobic setting and an impressive supporting cast (Tom Berenger, Robert Patrick, Charles S. Dutton, Kris Kristofferson) but apparently the production was troubled. The movie was shot in 1999 but it sat on the shelf for several years before it was finally dumped direct-to-video. I'm not sure why, because I thought it was pretty good.

"Survival of the Film Freaks" (2018)

Charmingly cheap "talking head" style documentary about the phenomenon of cult films and how they have not only survived but thrived over the years, changing with the technological times from the grindhouse era, through VHS, DVD, Blu-Ray, and the internet. Packed with tons of cool clips from obscure vintage cult goodies and commentary from experts like Sam (Evil Dead) Raimi, Lloyd (Troma) Kaufman, Greydon (Joy Sticks) Clark, Joe Bob Briggs, and more. Longtime junk-movie nerds probably won't learn anything new from this but it's a fun trip down memory lane.

I love docs like that because inevitably I find at least one film I've never heard of and have to track down.

Fear The Walking Dead

Finished up Season 2 of the Twilight Zone today with a very dark and heavy-handed, Cold War-inspired episode called "The Obsolete Man".  I didn't remember this one at all.  It stars Burgess Meredith and Fritz Weaver.  The most interesting thing about this one is that in the "And now Mr. Serling..." clip that ends all these where Rod tells you about next week's episode, he talked about "Where Is Everybody?" which actually ended up being the opening episode in Season 1.  Not sure how that got shuffled around.

"End of the Century: The Story of the Ramones" (2003)

Excellent documentary on the history of the punk rock pioneers, from their humble beginnings to their induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Extremely thorough, loaded with tons of vintage clips and photos and extensive interviews with the band members, their associates, and assorted friends and fans. One of my all time favorite rock docs.