Worst movie ever

Carnivore: I guarantee this is the worst movie ever.

detuned wrote:

anything directed by Roland Emmerich or Michael Bay. They should both be launched into orbit as soon as possible.

Yes! Two individuals who are decimating the beautiful art of film making as we once knew it...

I used to always say Karate Kid 3. Actually saw it in the theater. But years later it was on Starz and really it is just painfully boring. My all-time worst is the Monkees' movie Head. Words can't describe how much I hated that thing.

I dont mind the low budget horror films, they're actually pretty funny. IMO the worst movie I EVER SEEN is....... Napoleon Dynamite

MetalRob331 wrote:

I dont mind the low budget horror films, they're actually pretty funny. IMO the worst movie I EVER SEEN is....... Napoleon Dynamite

Really? That movie is like the bible for me.

It's a hated cliche to say when people 'just don't get it' but if someone hates Napoleon Dynamite then usually that is usually the exact case. Which is not meant to be anything resembling an insult at all so don't take it wrong. It's just......the situational humor of that movie in particular really tends to be so closed in, in such a way where you either can totally relate or can't at all. I've never seen an exception for reactions to that film.


Re: Emmerich, loved 'Independance Day', an ultimate popcorn movie in all the best ways and more, complete classic, no question, but when '10,000 BC' came out I knew he had completely lost his mind.

Forever Evil, easily the best movie 50 bucks and a camcorder can make! This was in the horror section of my local video store back when, and it mentioned Yog Sothoth so I figured it must be worth something. WRONG. But it's so unintentionally hilarious, I love it.

Schbopo wrote:

MetalRob331 wrote:

I dont mind the low budget horror films, they're actually pretty funny. IMO the worst movie I EVER SEEN is....... Napoleon Dynamite

Really? That movie is like the bible for me.

I used to go to a friends house who would watch this religiously and it was stupid, had no point, and was not even funny. I hated it.....

MetalRob331 wrote:

Schbopo wrote:

MetalRob331 wrote:

I dont mind the low budget horror films, they're actually pretty funny. IMO the worst movie I EVER SEEN is....... Napoleon Dynamite

Really? That movie is like the bible for me.

I used to go to a friends house who would watch this religiously and it was stupid, had no point, and was not even funny. I hated it.....

I guess it was one of those "had to be there" movies. Everybody my age could instantly relate to this exaggerated yet somehow believable nerd character to some extent or another. If you asked me to pick the ultimate "teenager" movie, it would be that one.

Napolean Dynamite
Avatar
Teen Wolf 2

tohostudios wrote:

detuned wrote:

anything directed by Roland Emmerich or Michael Bay. They should both be launched into orbit as soon as possible.

Can we make room on that launch for Uwe Boll?

Someone on IMDB once said that "Uwe Boll" is German for "Ed Wood Jr."

I always thought Parasite was pretty bad. I can remember the ads warning about how the creatures burst out of it's victims and that just stuck in my roughly 13 year old imagination for years. I finally got to see it a few years later on rental and was disappointed to say the least. The only saving grace was that it had a very young Demi Moore in it (I think her first role)

Fat Freddy wrote:

tohostudios wrote:

detuned wrote:

anything directed by Roland Emmerich or Michael Bay. They should both be launched into orbit as soon as possible.

Can we make room on that launch for Uwe Boll?

Someone on IMDB once said that "Uwe Boll" is German for "Ed Wood Jr."

House of the Dead has got to be THE WORST zombie/horror movie EVER MADE! - It's not even bad in the hilarious way, it's just terrible. The most interesting parts of the movie were the shots of topless teen girls. How can that man even call himself a director?

Mglaffas81 wrote:

Fat Freddy wrote:

tohostudios wrote:

detuned wrote:

anything directed by Roland Emmerich or Michael Bay. They should both be launched into orbit as soon as possible.

Can we make room on that launch for Uwe Boll?

Someone on IMDB once said that "Uwe Boll" is German for "Ed Wood Jr."

House of the Dead has got to be THE WORST zombie/horror movie EVER MADE! - It's not even bad in the hilarious way, it's just terrible. The most interesting parts of the movie were the shots of topless teen girls. How can that man even call himself a director?

Ever see Bloodrayne? That POS is practically incomprehensible.

kmorg wrote:

I always love to discuss bad movies, so I decided to start a new thread about the subject.

Alright! Presenting.....the WORST dickslap hollywood has managed to give me.....THIS G-rated piece of crap! Seriously, it's like the producers sat down and really, really, REALLY tried to come up with worst possible insult to the two classic Ace Ventura movies.

I was just reading Imdb reviews of Bloodrayne and they're freakin' hilarious. Here are 2 examples:

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Awkward dialogue, terrible camera work, poorly choreographed fight scenes (were they even choreographed at all?), sex for the sake of sex, and a plot so simple it seemed impossible to screw up (and yet he did), Boll once again proves his directorial ineptitude. This guy couldn't direct traffic if he wanted to, as proved (once again) by this train wreck of a film.

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After around 20 minutes or so of this "crowning turd" of a movie my "intellectual defence mechanism" automatically kicked-in and took my mind away to my next vacation, what to have for dinner, and the contents of my Partner's trousers. Sailing away on a sea of serenity(did I actually fall asleep?)I thought myself immune and totally protected from the train wreck of a movie unfolding on the other side of my eyelids. But then....wait! What's this? Snippets of dialogue totally unconnected with the Tequilla Sunrise I was drinking began to pervade my mind. Slowly at first, but growing in intensity. Warily, fearful that I may inadvertently catch another glimpse of Ben Kingsley's excruciating acting/staring, I opened one eye. Was I seeing/hearing things? I pulled myself up in the chair and opened the other eye (after assuring myself that Kingsley was nowhere to be seen). There, in front of me...what can never be described by a thousand monkeys on a thousand typewriters for a thousand years. The root canal work of movie making, the Xanadu of awfulness....Meatloaf trying to character-act.

I checked out the other movie-goers...hmmm, not many left....and they were all, very much like myself, staring wide eyed and open mouthed at witnessing the birth of a legend. Seriously, it was like watching the first moon landing all over again. This is one piece of crap for man...a whole turd for mankind.

I am sorry that I go on a little, but I cannot find words to describe the cameo piece by Meatloaf, in fact probably such words do not exist - they must be invented - "discrapungent" - try that one. I can only try to capture the magnificent awfulness by describing the effect that it had on myself and, I suspect, the other viewers.

If you haven't seen it (and I beg you all to do so) cut along to any cinema brave enough to show it and set your alarm clock for around 50 minutes. If you have trouble sleeping at the beginning, don't worry, Ben Kingsley will stare you into blessed catatonia....trust me.

The cover is the best part of this movie. Although from a movie entitled "Microwave Massacre" what was I expecting?

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The cover is the best part of this movie. Although from a movie entitled "Microwave Massacre" what was I expecting?

Wow. I remember staying over a friend's house when I was a kid and we stayed up late to watch that movie on cable. Good times.

SpectreFate wrote:

The cover is the best part of this movie. Although from a movie entitled "Microwave Massacre" what was I expecting?

Ha ha, that looks fantastic!

SpectreFate wrote:

The cover is the best part of this movie. Although from a movie entitled "Microwave Massacre" what was I expecting?

What makes this one even more bizarro world is that it stars Jackie Vernon, the comedian who provided the voice of "Frosty the Snowman" in the classic holiday special.

Back to the Future III
Russia House
Jaws 4

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Back to the Future III

I love love love the first 2. But you're right, this one just plain sucks.

exact33 wrote:

Jaws 4

Ohhhh man, how did it take this long for that one to get a mention?? I mean, "Jaws 3-D" was bad. But "4" was worse.

I actually paid $$ to see "Jaws: The Revenge" (aka Jaws 4) in a theatre in upstate NY when it first came out. If its legendary failure at the box office is anything to go by, I must be one of only a few dozen people on planet Earth who can make that claim.

I saw it at one of those cool old fashioned single-screen small town movie theatres (which were already a dying breed, even that many years ago) near my grandparents' house. I doubt my brother and I saw the name on the marquee and said "Cool, let's go see the new Jaws movie!"; more like it was the only movie theatre within 40 miles so we didn't have any other choices.

SpectreFate wrote:

Quote :

Back to the Future III

I love love love the first 2. But you're right, this one just plain sucks.

You two are smoking crack.

Fat Freddy wrote:

exact33 wrote:

Jaws 4

Ohhhh man, how did it take this long for that one to get a mention?? I mean, "Jaws 3-D" was bad. But "4" was worse.

I actually paid $$ to see "Jaws: The Revenge" (aka Jaws 4) in a theatre in upstate NY when it first came out. If its legendary failure at the box office is anything to go by, I must be one of only a few dozen people on planet Earth who can make that claim.

I saw it at one of those cool old fashioned single-screen small town movie theatres (which were already a dying breed, even that many years ago) near my grandparents' house. I doubt my brother and I saw the name on the marquee and said "Cool, let's go see the new Jaws movie!"; more like it was the only movie theatre within 40 miles so we didn't have any other choices.

Nothing better than the shark getting impaled then exploding for no dicernable reason !