TODAY I WATCHED ... (TV, Movies, Sports, etc.) 2024

"Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back" (2001)

Barred from hangin' in front of the Quick Stop, the stoner duo from "Clerks" embark on a cross country road trip to Hollywood to stop a movie from being made out of the "Bluntman & Chronic" comic book characters based on them. Along the way they hitch a ride with a foxy quartet of female jewel thieves, befriend an orangutan, and are pursued by a very determined Federal wildlife marshal (Will Ferrell).
Kevin Smith's road movie is dumb as hell but has a lot of cheap laughs, if you couldn't get enough of the foul mouthed pair in "Clerks" then you'll dig this.

Texas Chainsaw Double Feature last night via Peacock:

"Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation" (1994)

A quartet of Texas teens (one of whom is played by a young Renee Zellweger) ditch their senior prom and end up stranded on a country road after a traffic accident. Naturally, they encounter Leatherface and his twisted family, including his equally psychotic brother Vilmer (Matthew McConaughey!), who apparently works for the Illuminati ... or something.
Aside from the interesting pre-fame casting of Renee and Matthew (both of whom would probably like to strike this one from their resumes!), the fourth "TCM" movie is a jumbled mess. The prom teens are such idiots that they deserve everything that happens to them, and there's lots of characters yelling at each other, but very little in the way of chainsaw massacring. I'd heard this one was bad, but woof, I had no idea HOW bad. Even the most diehard TCM fans can skip this entry.

After sitting through that mess, I had to watch a good TCM movie to get the bad taste outta my mouth...

"Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2" (1986)

A lady radio DJ is targeted by a love-struck Leatherface and his cannibal clan when she plays a recording of one of their murders over the air. An obsessed Texas Ranger (a hilariously deadpan Dennis Hopper, who really looks like he'd rather be somewhere else) looking for revenge arrives to battle the entire "Sawyer" family saw-to-saw.
Tobe Hooper's sequel to his 1974 classic is bigger, louder, and WAY goofier than the original, but it's certainly not dull. The gore quotient is increased and the tongue-in-cheek performances makes the whole thing play like a black comedy. Legend has it that the honchos at Cannon Films, who were expecting a straight up horror flick, were disappointed in the final product, but "TCM2" went on to become a cult classic in its own right.

Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things (1972)



Bob Clark's foray into horror about a troupe of actors heading to an island to dabble in the occult and resurrect the dead. Unfortunately for them it backfires and the dead return aggressively and start their assault on the group. A fun little movie and the first in color film featuring Romero-type zombies. A little side note trivia: one of the actors playing a troupe member was also on Clark's classic A Christmas Story as the department store Santa.

Episodes of Becker, Mama's Family and Supermarket Sweep.

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From

Darryl Dixon

Grotesquerie

"Halloween III: Season of the Witch" (1982)

A doctor (Tom Atkins) uncovers a Druid plot to kill millions of children on Halloween night with booby trapped masks activated by a sinister TV signal.
This was an unsuccessful attempt to pivot the Halloween franchise away from Michael Myers and into an annual series of stand-alone films centered around the holiday. It didn't do much business when it was first released but it's garnered a strong cult following in the years since. I've always liked its utterly bizarre blend of sci-fi and horror, and John Carpenter's way-cool, creepy as hell synthesized score is some of his best musical work. Underrated, and certainly more enjoyable than many of the Halloween sequels that followed with Myers back in place.

"House on Haunted Hill" (1999)

Five people are invited to an all-night party at a supposedly haunted former insane asylum, with a prize of $1 million to anyone who makes it till morning. Mayhem ensues.
This stylish remake of the 1950s Vincent Price oldie has great, creepy-cool set designs, cool monster effects, and a strong cast that includes Geoffrey Rush (whose character is a dead ringer for Price), Famke "X-Men" Janssen, and even ex-"SNL" dude Chris Kattan. One of the better horror remakes of the era.

"Young Frankenstein" (1974)

The grandson of the original Dr. Frankenstein inherits his grandfather's castle and decides to continue his ancestors work. Wacky hijinks ensue.
Mel Brooks' dead-on parody of 1930s black & white monster movies nails the period details and is stacked with an amazing cast incl. Gene Wilder, Peter Boyle, Madeline Kahn, and Teri Garr (whose passing yesterday leaves Mel as the only surviving member of the film's major players). A stone cold classic.

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Wrapped up my October horror-thon last night with...

"Tales of Halloween" (2015)

A fun anthology flick featuring ten tales of terror which all take place around the same small town on Halloween night. The stories include killer trick-or-treaters, a Jason-style slasher who meets his match, a kidnapping plot that goes really wrong, and carnivorous jack-o-lanterns. Not every story is a home run but this flick's mix of goofball humor and gory nastiness, with lots of in-jokes for long time horror nerds, make this one a fun watch for me year after year.

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"Deadpool & Wolverine" (2024)

Ryan Reynolds is back for a third go round as Marvel's Merc with a Mouth, and this time he's brining everyone's favorite X-Man with him!
When a super-villain threatens to mess with Marvel's multiple timelines and eliminate Deadpool's universe altogether, The Pool enlists the help of a past-his-prime Wolverine (as well as a few other surprising cameos whom I will not spoil) in order to put things right. As usual, the bullets, F-bombs, bodies, and one liners fly in equal measure. An absolutely crazy, action packed hoot. Loads of ultra-violent fun.

"Used Cars" (1980)

Two feuding brothers (both played by the great Jack Warden) run competing used-car dealerships right across the road from each other. When one of them dies, his employees (led by salesman Kurt Russell) go to absurd lengths to keep the rival brother from taking over "their" business.
This early '80s cable TV staple from director Robert Zemeckis (later of "Back to the Future" and "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" fame) has aged pretty well, with a lot of raunchy gags and a fair bit of car crashin' mayhem in the final reel. Silly fun.

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