Have we really gone this far??? (contains hardcore lulz)

In
case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to
stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my h...air.)

On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap,"
(and that would be how???....)

On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)

On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time)?

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We
could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could
just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what)?

On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious)

On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, ooh...fly Delta?)

On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my ..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity.

That was AWESOME!

I can see two that were printed as jokes. The others, well, seem like they need to be printed on there.

that last one has got to be made up.

mc666 wrote:

that last one has got to be made up.

Not if you are Norwegian! We have a lot of those Swedish ones here. Like what does it say at the bottom of a Swedish soda can? "Opens at the top".

We are truly the Forrest Gump world

WAT HARDCORE XXX LULZ BOIIIIIIIIIIII DESE LULZ NOT FOR KIDS YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN

LMAO Bill Engvall on Heres Your Sign has a few of those

kmorg wrote:

mc666 wrote:

that last one has got to be made up.

Not if you are Norwegian! We have a lot of those Swedish ones here. Like what does it say at the bottom of a Swedish soda can? "Opens at the top".

Ha, it seems no one in Scandinavia can get along. What's the stereotype for Norwegians anyway? If I recall correctly, Swedes are all queer metrosexuals and Finns are depressed alcoholics...

Dave the Boss wrote:

kmorg wrote:

mc666 wrote:

that last one has got to be made up.

Not if you are Norwegian! We have a lot of those Swedish ones here. Like what does it say at the bottom of a Swedish soda can? "Opens at the top".

Ha, it seems no one in Scandinavia can get along. What's the stereotype for Norwegians anyway? If I recall correctly, Swedes are all queer metrosexuals and Finns are depressed alcoholics...

We're the happy-go-lucky drunks pillaging your village!

Ha, that isn't too bad. According to Belgians Dutch people are boring cheapskates who smoke pot every day and have a profound love for prostitutes...

Dave the Boss wrote:

Ha, that isn't too bad. According to Belgians Dutch people are boring cheapskates who smoke pot every day and have a profound love for prostitutes...

Well, aren't you?

I'm not sure what the stereotypeing of Nrowegians are. Guess you'll have to ask a Swede...

Funny stuff.

Dave the Boss wrote:

Ha, that isn't too bad. According to Belgians Dutch people are boring cheapskates who smoke pot every day and have a profound love for prostitutes...

I never knew this before, apparently I'm part dutch.














































I'm no cheapskate!

kmorg wrote:

Dave the Boss wrote:

Ha, that isn't too bad. According to Belgians Dutch people are boring cheapskates who smoke pot every day and have a profound love for prostitutes...

Well, aren't you?

I'm not sure what the stereotypeing of Nrowegians are. Guess you'll have to ask a Swede...

Now that I think of it, a classmate of mine is Swedish. I guess I'll ask her...

Here's one I saw a while back:

On a can of hair spray--"Do not spray in eyes."
(but my eyes are flat and won't stay in place)

Funny, but I wouldn't exactly classify those "lulz" as "hardcore"...